CH#270
#270
The clockâs hands had moved, and it was around 10 oâclock in the morning. I was in my room, lying on my bed and staring at the ceiling.
After discussing our future following the conversation with my sister about her true feelings in the early morning, there was no sign of her at home.
My sister had disappeared without telling our father and mother. Of course, I knew where she was going and why she had made this choice.
However, it was only a matter of time before our parents noticed. They would come to check on the children who hadnât shown up for breakfast.
In the limited time I had, I had to solidify my decision regarding the actions I was about to take. As I reminded myself repeatedly, there were no do-overs in life.
One mistake was a lifetimeâs worth of failure. Even if I tried to paint over that failure, the stain would remain forever.
What I was about to do was precisely that sort of action. My sister had chosen a path that I would never have taken in her place, and she believed in it. It was too late to be scared now; I had to calm my restless heart.
I had to discard my naive thoughts that children should be treated gently and start thinking with the assumption that the other party was in a superior position. I couldnât waver in my resolve.
I leaned my forehead against the back of my hand and exhaled.
From outside the quiet room, the sound of slippers approaching in the hallway could be heard.
âMinato? Are you still in bed?â
My mother stood in front of the door and called after knocking a few times.
This morning exchange in the Shinra family home was a rare event, and it brought back nostalgic feelings.
I naturally cracked a smile, but this was not the time for sentimentality.
I walked up to the door, and my mother opened it. She took a few steps back, wearing a somewhat exasperated expression.
âYour mother wonât be happy if you siblings stay up late.â
âBoth I and Kaede have been up for a while. What about Dad?â
At first, she looked a little surprised at the fact that I, who was supposed to be weak in the morning, came out of the room with a clear expression. As for my answer, she had just pointed to the living room.
âHeâs in the living room, doing some work.â
ââŚThank you.â
I replied, expressing gratitude as I walked past her. I proceeded down the short hallway and opened the living room door, where the sound of the morning news from the TV was audible.
In my field of vision was my father, who had become a fixture in our home, intently working on his computer with a stack of papers at hand. He glanced at me from the corner of his eye to acknowledge my presence but quickly returned his gaze to his work. Instead of a morning greeting, his first words were somewhat sarcastic.
âIf youâre having breakfast, make it quick. Your mother canât clean up forever.â
ââŚâ
I was met with the strict, typical response of a father admonishing his teenage son. But did you notice, dear father, the bedhead you have going on? It was as if you were oblivious to the fact. Maybe youâve let your guard down a bit because youâre working from home. Or perhaps, since youâre not leaving the house today, you deemed it unnecessary to check your appearance, a task your wife would normally perform for you.
The mismatch between your words and appearance is quite something. Itâs like a kid calling the local power lines the Tokyo Tower.
Suppressing the urge to let out a sigh, I approached to talk to him before he locked himself in his study. I stopped a few steps away from his workspace, realizing he wouldnât sit down, and our eyes met.
âIâm not going abroad, neither is Kaede.â
âWhat nonsense are youââ
âThatâs what youâre speaking as well.â
He had just placed a stack of documents on his desk and was about to release a heavy sigh when I cut in. My father shifted from irritation to a more serious expression upon hearing my words.
I had expected opposition, but there was no use trying to counter it. He was going to insist on his point of view regardless of my discontent.
âI already told you initially that you could stay in Japan.â
âStop making it sound like youâre giving me a choice⌠there was never an option for me other than staying in Japan from the beginning.â
The only thing I was given was a fixed path, already determined. As parent and child, we should have had discussions, conversations, but I was merely informed of what suited his convenience. Just because he was my father didnât mean I had to agree with his words and obey without question. If it was wrong, it needed to be corrected.
Going abroad might be a good choice for my father, but it was a detrimental one for Kaede. It could potentially have a huge impact on her future relationships and was, in essence, a very poor move.
What should be normal was anything but normal in the case of the Shinra family. Leaving a minor child at home and moving abroad wasnât a normal family dynamic. They left the housework for my sister, and all we had was a transactional relationship based on allowances.
Theyâd return every once in a while, often bearing gifts that the children had no interest in. To top it off, they were about to disrupt my sisterâs carefully crafted school life, which she had built up over nearly a year.
âIf youâre thinking about fulfilling your dreams from your student days through your children, thatâs just self-indulgence.â
âItâs a parentâs duty to nurture a childâs talent in the right environment.â
âIn that case⌠leaving his own son, who is a student, all alone and departing is considered an appropriate level of education, right?â
I didnât intend this to be sarcastic. I just wanted to express my genuine feelings.
Someday, the time would come for both of us to leave our parentsâ home and stand on our own. I always believed that this should happen, but not when we were in the midst of our student years. Feeling partly abandoned wasnât unjustified, given the nature of the issue my father had presented.
âHey, Dad⌠When did we go wrong? When did we become such an uncomfortable family?â
Back when our parents were still at home, when Kaede and I were younger, we were certainly a more cheerful family. Itâs true that excessive expectations were placed on Kaede due to her natural talents, but we used to be a family with more smiles.
When did our family lose its ability to talk and laugh together, and when did we stop showing any smiles? These questions seemed to weigh heavily on my father.
He lowered his gaze, either because he had some inkling of an answer or because he was contemplating it. Nevertheless, my question had definitely reached fatherâs heart. Not letting this escape my attention, I continued.
âWould you reconsider⌠if you think about Kaede, studying abroad is the worst possible choice.â
ââŚâ
For the first time, I felt like I was asking my father for something. Up until now, when I needed something, I always asked Mom. I knew he dotes on Kaede, which made me feel reluctant to ask for anything. I sometimes questioned whether I was even needed, somewhere deep down inside.
Maybe itâs okay if Iâm not needed, but just hear these words. I must have wanted to be seen by my father as well, or I would have wanted to lean on my mother at times. For this past year, Iâve been supporting the household as the responsible older brother.
Kaede supported my heart, but it could have been me, or my childhood friend Shizuku, or my school friends. It could have been all of them. When everything is taken away at once, how will Kaede feel?
I believe my father isnât the kind of person who canât think about such a situation. I quietly awaited my fatherâs reaction.
However, my father never nodded in agreement.
âPerhaps Kaede will experience some sadness for a while⌠but considering her future life, studying abroad and living together there should be beneficial for our daughter.â
âBut initially, you said sheâd come back to Japan right away.â
âIf the companyâs situation changes, then personnel decisions inevitably change as well⌠thatâs how companies work.â
My fatherâs tone was so resigned and enlightened as he spoke. I couldnât help but feel a mix of complex emotions. I realized that, despite telling us to follow his lead, he hadnât opposed the company at all.
He had probably just given in and nodded his head while wearing a pleasant expression. It was easier to convince his family than to argue with the company. I couldnât help but feel that no matter what I said now, my father wouldnât change his mind. So, I sighed and let go of all my previous expectations.
Well, it couldnât be helped. I wanted to resolve this with conversation and persuasion, and I didnât want to jeopardize our family relationships any further. With that breath I let out, I cast away all my previous expectations.
âIâve had enough⌠Iâll take care of Kaede. Father, feel free to move abroad.â
âYou? Itâs impossible, no doubt⌠I mean, youâre still a student. How would youââ
âWeâll stay at grandpaâs house until I graduate from high school. I was considering further education, but even if it means working, Iâll earn enough for Kaedeâs tuition⌠and all those arranged marriage discussions would be nulled as well.â
With just this statement, I turned my back, as there was nothing more to discuss. Father, who had been sitting up, stood up and put his hand on my shoulder, saying,
âDonât act so childishly! âŚWhereâs Kaede? Bring her here, I need to talk to her.â
âSheâs at grandpaâs house already⌠I sent her there with the minimum essentials early this morning.â
Father directed his gaze toward Mother, but I gave the answer. Kaede had probably arrived at her grandparentsâ house by now.
In the morning, we decided that she would hide before the two of them woke up. If they wouldnât engage in a discussion and only made unilateral decisions, then there was no room for discussion from our side.
Fatherâs mistake was that he proposed studying abroad, emphasizing how he wanted to be a good father, but it was a clear rejection considering Kaedeâs actions. It was equivalent to her agreeing with the choice I made.
âAre you planning to disregard all the hardships Iâve been through so far?â
âUnfortunately, yes, Father⌠But itâs not for the sake of our hardships, itâs for your own good.â
In a voice filled with anger, I let his words and gaze flow past me, speaking the truth.
Was the arranged marriage story for your sonâs future? No, it was different. The company that the presidentâs parents are involved with is a business partner of Fatherâs company. It was one of the choices to get on good terms as the person in charge.
Thinking about Kaedeâs future, studying abroad? No, it was different. He just wanted to keep his precious and lovely daughter close by.
Itâs all for himself, and the reasons are nothing more than an afterthought.
That was the reason I asked, âWhere did you go wrong?â
At the very least, the father from the past wasnât like this. He had always been someone who cared for his family. Even on busy days, he would clear his schedule and make time for family outings that were planned on weekends.
I have vivid memories of those times when, despite receiving sarcastic complaints from his boss the next day, he was comforted by my mother.
âHow much longer are you going to disrespect your parents?â
The hand that had been gripping my shoulder moved to the front of my chest, tightly clutching my clothes. The close proximity brought our noses to almost touch, and a strong gaze was directed at me.
In reality, I would have preferred to avert my gaze and maintain silence. However, I couldnât afford to yield here.
âKaede isnât your precious little dress-up doll, you know⌠Canât you grant one of Kaedeâs long-standing wishes for once?â
As I retorted, I pushed his hand off his arm that was grabbing me.
Please donât overlay my memories of Dad onto the person in front of me. I want to preserve those memories as clean as possible.
As I opened my eyes once again, I could see that this man in front of me bore no trace of the father from before. There were no overwhelming emotions welling up in my chest. I simply looked at the person before me with a calm and composed gaze.
âMinato⌠Just who do you think you owe everything to all thisââ
Father began to speak, but he never finished the sentence. Just as he was about to say something, Mom rushed over and slapped his cheek with her right hand. In the living room, the sound of her palm hitting his cheek echoed, and Fatherâs face turned towards the left from the impact.
âYou⌠you were about to say something a parent should never say.â
Her voice was devoid of the usual warmth and gentleness. It was icy and merciless.
The eyes that looked at Father went beyond anger; they were chillingly cold, as if freezing my spine. I had never seen Mom like this.
She had watched over us quietly, without intervening in our conversation until now, but by breaking her silence, she brought Father to the point where his expression darkened.
As Father slowly turned his gaze back, Mom declared.
âIâll be taking care of the children from now on, so you can go ahead with your plans for moving overseas.â
At the sound of these words, Fatherâs shoulders trembled. But I couldnât bear to witness any more than that.
I turned my back to the room and left. As I walked through the hallway and exited the house, I leaned against the door, letting out a deep breath.
As I turned my back and began to leave the room, Mom kindly called out to me.
âMinato, could you also go pick up Kaede?â
ââŚI understand.â
âThank you, Onii-chan.â
With a faint smile, she saw me off. I nodded in response, then left the room. I walked down the hallway, and when I reached the front door, I couldnât help but lean my back against it and let out a deep breath.
âHaaâŚâ
I never expected Mom, whom I thought would never take my side, to extend a lifeline to me. Actually, I was saved in more ways than one.
If Father had continued speaking his mind without any restraint, I would have responded with my own unfiltered emotions.
There would have been no constructive outcome in such a futile exchange.
Or rather, it wouldnât have been constructive in Minatoâs dictionary at all. I probably would have just resorted to relentless insults.
For example⌠âidiotâ or âmoronâ⌠or maybe even âbaldyâ.
Am I acting like a child? Yeah, I guess I am. I want to stay a child, after all.
I want a life of adolescence for the rest of my life, a world without the need to work, a life where compulsory education never ends.
Am I just tired? Iâm thinking strange things.
I readjusted my focus and resumed my stride. Kaede must be bored on her own.
I need to go pick her up and talk to her about this whole series of events. Iâm sure thereâs an ongoing storm of angry words from Mom to Dad inside the house.
Even a Buddha can lose their patience thrice, but a mother only twice, and it seems that Mom reached hers when Dad was about to utter words he shouldnât say to their child.
Glancing back at our receding home, I muttered under my breath.
âCool your head⌠you idiot, Dad.â
Then I turned around and started walking back toward Grandpaâs house. From the opposite direction, I saw a familiar figure, Shizuku, carrying a convenience store bag in casual clothes.
Noticing my presence, Shizuku waved and rushed over, her first question being.
âMinato-kun, is everything resolved?â
âDonât worry⌠just a parent-child argument.â
Right now, I had to go pick up Kaede. I could explain the details of the situation later.
I gave her a light pat on the head and then waved goodbye before leaving. Thatâs about as much as I would tell her - that I had a little argument with Kaede and Dad.
I didnât want to say that I didnât want to give up my life with Shizuku, Kirasaka, Yuuto, and President. It was too embarrassing to say it out loud.
**
Archived Comments
Mirilu (on 2023-10-16 23:57:22):
If this was a different novel, the author would add Shizukuâs POV and describe how she just came, lol.
Dad got so wrecked. I wonder what he was about to say.